I'm a 19-year-old Brit who loves to read books and blogs. I enjoy photography as well as a fair bit of YouTube and I mainly blog about books I've read or topics that have inspired me :)
This subject struck me and I don't think I can possibly be the only one who's ever felt this way, but sometimes you get excited and you're jumping all over the walls, all giddy with excitement with glee and joy but there's not anyone you can find who is willing to share that with you. Or just doesn't see the same thing and sometimes with me, it feels like I can't tell anyone who won't share my enthusiasm for whatever it is because I feel like it loses worth because it doesn't receive the same amount of feeling as it does with me.
In some ways, it makes it feel less valid unless someone can share it with me but can feel sort of weird if someone feels exactly the same way? For me, the greatness expands when I can sharethefeeling with someone and watch them grow happier as a consequence of what I've told them. Then, in my mind, we share more. It's the understanding and empathy that my mind feeds off of and it's something I quite often need which feels quite selfish really.
What scares me is feeling like my excitement is withering away with me because I can't find people irl or on the internet who feel like they genuinely understand where I'm coming from and that makes me sad. But should I? Should I be entitlted to people understanding my excitement and why I feel the way I feel and vice versa or is happiness and love and excitement still as true without the sharing element that feels like it matters so much.
Have you guys ever felt this way? Please do let me know however you like and I hope to speak to you soon! God Bless!<3
Hey guys! I hope that you've all been fine and dandy since I last spoke to you!
This was a topic that really has bugged me for a while and I'm pretty sure anyone who feels guilty about small things or relatively small things they do wrong probably understands where I'm coming from.
Most people know the feeling - you do something small wrong or you forget to do something - and you instantly feel bad but then whoever it'll affect or whoever you expect to perhaps blow your head off goes on and says 'No, it's okay' with a smile and continues on.
This confuses me so much. Whatever I did wasn't okay otherwise I wouldn't have bad for doing it! Why on earth should it be okay with you for me not to do what I'm supposed to do? How is that okay at all?
I feel like it's more confusing when the person says that's what they expect of you - how do you do the thing when you can't do it anymore? How do you rid yourself of the guilt of knowing that someone is trying to make you feel better when it's your inadequacy that probably means they have more work to do because of you? How can that ever be okay?
This for me is generally most confusing because it's never followed by an explanation. For example, if the other person thinks you have a genuine reason for not having done the thing like because you've had a lot of work or because you've been focusing on other parts of your responsibilities. That's only really cuts it when you can agree with them but how can you move on knowing that you could've done the thing but didn't really want to?
I may be making no sense whatsoever to some of you but I guess it bugs me when I don't learn from my mistakes and try and grow and move on from my laziness. If any of you guys can empathise with me in any shape or form, it would be so great to hear from you in the comments! Even if you don't please tell me why, I'd love to hear why!
Thank you so much for reading, I can't tell you how much it means to me! Have an awesome week and I hope to speak to you soon! God Bless :) x
This little subject was bugging me, so I thought I'd talk to you guys about it and see what you think :)
I find it hard when people don't try and empathise with other people when they've come from a different background from themselves, especially sometimes when they've come from an extreme so a really wealthy background or a really poor background. It hurts me because they act as if the people are acting inconsiderately or are acting really self-involved and in a selfish manner whilst whatever they're experiencing or have experienced is just the way life has been for them from wherever they've come from.
It also annoys me because these comments and judgements are often overlooking the good parts of the person's personality which are often in much larger abundance than the other parts of their personality and what makes them who they are that other people may have a problem with.
It annoys me most because of the fact that they expect people to be able to find exactly the right way to say something when that's practically impossible because you can't always be considerate and you can't always find the 'right way' to say something. Some things will always have negative connotations or a specific connotation and there's nothing much that can be done other than to try not to see it in that way.
All I'd like to challenge everyone here is, if you hear something negative or say something negative, always try and think about how the best way of having said that would be. If there's no other way of saying it, don't take offense or be surprised if other people are offended by it. It always pays off to think that way so you don't feel as if you're constantly being offended. Also consider other factors like how much time the other person was given to come up with their response, that can always change the way they word things too.
Finally, also try and accept people for their flaws and that sometimes people don't always have the eloquence or the quick wittedness to be able to express the way they think or the way they feel adequately. Don't judge them for it because if you know that if you were them, you wouldn't want to be labelled by your flaws either. Instead, try and label people by their strengths. I personally find this makes me a much happier person because then you end up feeling less horrified and more appreciative of the people around you and their talents :)
I hope that you guys enjoyed this post! As always, please leave your thoughts in the comments below and I hope to speak to you soon! :D x
I don't know if it's just me (I suspect it's probably not) but I never really know how to take compliments.
It's often just because I don't know if I deserve praise because often it's just me doing what I'm supposed to be doing, in which case, is what I'm doing really that spectacular? Do I really deserve praise?
However, having said that, I can completely understand why people give compliments because I do it myself and it's often for encouragement purposes. For example, I was helping to train a new member of staff last week and she was absolutely brilliant and was great on the ball and making sure every step of the process was done. I think the reason why a lot of us sometimes feel like we should compliment people is because it can sometimes feel like it's a lot easier to criticise people than just to accept that they're pretty amazing at something. Not saying that you would just focus on the negatives but I think it's great to have that encouragement to know that you're going in the right direction, even if you're just doing what you're supposed to be doing.
However, I think the point is that sometimes you can feel obliged to give someone a compliment to make them feel better and I feel like sometimes this can happen more often with kids because they're a lot more sensitive. If a kid is making a lot of mistakes and you have to keep telling them that they're making the mistakes, you can feel like you need to tell them about the things they're getting right so that they don't feel like they're not making any progress and getting everything wrong.
I think, personally, the main problem I have with compliments, whether it be on your work or on your physical appearance is exaggeration. I hate feeling like I can't accept a compliment because it's too over the top and not realistic when, in fact, it might be. It's one reason I find it hard to give compliments because I feel like the way I see reality isn't good enough to warrant giving a compliment that would serve to encourage a person. I wish I would have enough confidence to be truthful in my compliments and not over indulge. I don't want people who are like me to feel like they can't accept compliments because they're probably too good to be true.
I hope that you guys enjoyed this post! As always, please leave your thoughts in the comments below and I hope to speak to you soon!
One of the things that has fascinated me for ages is to see how people work and why they do what they do. I was thinking about studying Psychology next year, I'll admit it aha (I didn't because the exams sounded pretty damn hard!) but it definitely is something that interests me for a few reasons.
a) I've always loved or taken an interest in analysing myself. This would help me because it would help me to spot things that got me worked up or annoyed and a few people have mentioned it being useful because it means that you can notice changes in yourself better and what causes you to get stressed or worked up and that means that you can help control yourself and how you're feeling, much better! This is definitely a reason why I was interested in Psychology before just because it feels so much more intimate when it's your own feelings that you're dealing with and it means that you can feel a bit less like an-out-of-control hormonal-teenager when you react adversely to something. I hope that made sense, moving on!
b) Of course, to understand other people and why they do the things that they do. This seems pretty obvious but I myself want to become a more understanding, compassionate and empathetic person and you can't really do that unless you understand how the person is feeling and why they may react to something the way that they do. I used to be able to do this a little too well and I must say I don't know anyone else irl who can do the same thing and really connect with a person. I have come across Carrie Hope Fletcher who goes way beyond me and actually connects that deeply to story-book characters to the point that she feels their worries and anxieties along with her own on a daily basis (link here to her channel) but yeah, understanding other people can really build your character and help you not to get angry at other people or saddened because when you can understand why something's happened, it doesn't make it as confusing anymore.
I hope that you guys liked this post! Please feel free to empty your thoughts into the comments below and I'll speak to you guys soon! I hope your weeks are going well!<3
Hey guys! I hope that you're all fine and dandy and well!
It struck me one day that time is a very odd concept and the way that it drives us and what we do and how our lives run is phenomenal. Like, for example, the fact that with time you can become better at something and how, as kids, we're not just smaller versions of our adult selves but we're incredibly inexperienced and unequipped for the world that's out there and what it demands of the world's population.
It does also occur to me sometimes that it feels odd thinking that our race of organism is both very animal like in the way that everything works inside us, we eat, we poo, our bodies have the same organs as pretty much any other mammal which means that we all need the same sort of machinery, if you like, inside us to help us work and yet the fact that we're so, so different in the way that we work and think sometimes, in comparison to other animals is just mind blowing.
I hope that you guys liked this post! It's definitely considerably shorter than my normal posts but I hope that it was short and sweet :) Do feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments below!
I hope that you guys have a wonderful weekend and I'll speak to you on Monday!
(If you guys hadn't realised just yet, I've managed to get into the habit of posting on Mondays, Wednesdays and Saturdays so do feel free to keep your eyes peeled for the posts as they come! :) )
If you guys haven't heard of Zach Sobiech before then I would strongly suggest that you watch the following two videos because I can almost fully guarantee that you'll cry.
Go on, please, even if you're not one for 'inspirational' videos, it'll still be something to watch :)
If you don't have the time to watch the videos, here's a written version of parts of the video I loved and what I learned from it :) Zach is a 17-year-old boy who was diagnosed with a rare type of bone cancer during his late teens. He was told that he'd either have life saving surgery that would take out his left leg and part of half of his pelvis which, would mean he'd not be able to sit up, or he would die within 6 months to a year. He chose to live his last few months to the best of his ability and these videos just explore how much he touched the lives of everyone around him.
A friend of his at school said 'He's just a person that you can trust will be smiling.' Some of his other friends said that he helped them put their problems and complaints into perspective, that a bad day wasn't really as bad as they thought :) This is just one part of how he touched other people's lives. For me this little snippet is so good because it's not great spending more time feeling down because of your day rather than enjoying it and having someone who can remind you of that is just amazing and I wish I could do that for my friends :)
He was a best friend to his younger sister and he was just a person that would make you feel better just by being in his presence.
He was just a joy to his parents and made them proud with all that he did and he was really kind and compassionate. He inspired his class mates and made them feel good about themselves. He would never put other people down and in the first video his Mum talks about how they went to watch a basketball game together. She made a comment about how one of the players was running funny and he replied with a list of things that the same player had done well. That in itself is really inspirational, to not be satisfied with putting someone down but making sure that they are praised where it's due. His mum said 'He's always been very empathetic and compassionate.' It really shows that we shouldn't be happy at the expense of someone else's dignity, that we should celebrate them and through celebrating each other, be happy :)
He was described by his eldest sister as 'happy, always smiling.' and I think we all need to spread the joy, we hear it all the time but there's so much we can do and all we've got to do is take that step :)
His eldest sister also said: 'Zach is a testament to the fact that everything's okay when you believe in something greater.' I don't know whether it's easier or harder to be in Zach's situation and to have or not have faith in something greater though with me personally I would definitely say something greater because it would help you realise that everyone goes through something different and because Zach was such an amazing person, he had a harder test. God wanted to be reunited with him :)
His youngest sister said: 'Well, I've got to live life, like well as if Zach's going to die tomorrow.' The odd thing is, it's the same for most of us because we don't know when we're going to die and I guess for them it was easier to have that reminder in front of them but if we live with that mentality, maybe we can experience the same richness that the Sobiechs experienced knowing that time was precious. It made beauty so much more beautiful and moments just that much more precious.
His brother said: 'It's imperative that we stick together as a family because we've got to make it through, as a family.' It just shows how much support is important, whether you be going through something as life changing as the Sobiechs or just the normal flow of life, you've got to stick it out for your family because you can't choose your family :)
His girlfriend said: 'He's shown me that it's not all about the grades you get or how cool you are in high school, it's about doing what makes you happy and no matter when you're going to go but to live your life to the fullest, every day of your life.'
I also loved these videos because it proves what you can do for another person - Zach got into cars and found out that the Nissan GTR was the car that was the least expensive with the highest performance and his family organised for him to be able to drive it for a week. When he found out he described the sensation as being 'like you've been dumped in cold water and you can't breathe, but in a really good way.' I think it just proves to us that it's never late or the wrong time to do something for someone else.
It just feels like, watching those videos, that Zach just left an enormous impression on everyone that had the pleasure to meet him and being able to hit people, not just with is words and actions but with his music meant that he understood that it would be hard for those people who were close to him once he was gone. He created songs to help his family with closure. He didn't stop dreaming big because he was dying and that was awesome - he didn't give up and I think a lot of us who aren't limited with time and capability would dream a lot smaller than Zach.
Here are some of the Zach quotes from the first video that I just love :)
'It's kinda like you're sitting in the dark. You can either choose to be freaking out in the dark and thinking okay what's out there or you can just relax and fall asleep and just be happy and content with everything.'
'I want everyone to know that you don't have to find out you're dying, to start living.'
'What makes you happy, is seeing someone smile and knowing that you put it there. That's what's so awesome about living in this world.'
'You can either sit in your basement and wait, or you can get out there and do some crazy stuff.'
'Mum and Dad, I wish I could have kids and raise them like you raised me because you've done a hell of a job.'
'It's really simple actually, it's just try and make people happy. Maybe you have to learn it with time, or maybe you have to learn it the hard way, but as long as you learn it, you're going to make the world a better place.'
'I want to be remembered as the kid who went down fighting and didn't really lose.'
Thank you so much for reading. I'm sorry but not sorry that this is such a long post but I really think Zach deserves as much for being such a ginormous inspiration. I've not even really scratched the surface with the amount we can take from Zach but I hope it inspired you! The first video was released on the 3rd of May in 2013 which was Zach's 18th Birthday. He died on the 20th of the same month and if there's one grave I would love to visit in my life, that'd be one.
Please leave your thoughts in the comments and I will speak to you soon!
This has been something that's swum through my mind over the past few years: when someone tells you something is 'wrong' with you in the way you are, or the way you do things, how much should you have to feel obliged to change because of what they've said.
I guess it can all come back down to what they've said I guess, whether it be something you've done as a one-off that was an accident perhaps because you were having an off day. Or is it something that goes that little bit deeper like 'you talk too much', or 'you always talk about yourself' and that sort of thing. I've picked these because I've experienced them before but there are countless othet things that can be said that can get under your skin.
I think we should always be wary but here are a few things to take into consideration:
1) Why have they said what they've said? Would they have good intentions for having said what they've said? Can you trust their word?
2) Ask someone close to you if they agree with what the person has said. If you're not sure whether to believe the person or not, feel free to ask someone who knows you well and ask for their opinion - if there's any truth to it, maybe they can shed some light on it.
3) Watch out for yourself: do you see any truth in what they've said? This is really important - if you're honest with yourself and you detect a problem within the way you act then you can feel more self-aware and make steps towards changing yourself.
However, what I do want to make clear here is the fact it is entirely up to you what you consider to be something worth changing.
As a personal example, I was told by a person who I used to be close to that I talked too much about myself. After much deliberation I realised that wasn't the actual problem - it was the fact I interrupted too much and didn't allow other people to talk and let out their problems before sharing my own. In this way you can see that I wanted to solve this problem because it was a matter of manners, not necessarily something that was personal but a characteristic that would be considered rude no matter who I was talking to.
In my opinion, if you're polite and considerate, who should dictate what kind of person you are from there onwards but yourself? Don't change yourself to please others because you'll never be good enough. Be happy with yourself and no-one can take that away from you.
I hope that you guys enjoyed this blog post! Please do feel free to tell me what you think in the comments and please do feel free to suggest topics for future blog posts!
Thank you ever so much for reading and I'll speak to you soon :)
Hey guys! Today's post is feeling a bit more morose, I guess you could say, than the posts I've been writing over the past week or so. I felt like with more reading, I escaped reality a bit too much for my own good, so I decided to write a post about something that feels like it's coming closer and closer to home: war.
You don't have to be all over media to know that war is something that is threatening many innocent people's lives on a day to day basis. I just hate knowing that innocent people happily fled their homes in the thousands and hundred of thousands because of threats made upon their lives by people who don't know them nor want to try and know them. Half a million people were displaced by the ISAS in Iraq, simply because they thought that leaving everything that they had and escaping with their lives was the one thing that was right and that could guarantee their lives. No-one should have to live that way.
I'm not going to preach or shove statistics in your faces because you know where you can find those.
It just struck me that I'm incredibly grateful to be living in a place where I'm accepted for who I am, where people are quite free to express themselves and be who they want to be. I feel like that liberty is something we don't really have the right to take for granted and all I wanted to say to you today is that please, do something good with your life because there are so many people in the world today who have the potential to become amazing, brilliant and talented people, but cannot do so simply because of where they have been born in the world.
Please, don't take opportunities for granted, even in the part of the world where we live in, opportunities don't come often for everyone. Cherish what you have and remember those who don't. Do what you can to be a good person so less people lose days when they could be happy and grateful, to days where they're knocked by people close and by people who don't know them. Keep your perspective in life :)
I hope that you guys liked this post, however different it's been from my normal content :)
It was brought on by Jack Harries having his camera equipment stolen from him in Kenya at gunpoint and it really hit me that people will want to hurt you whether they know you or not, if they are driven to believe so.
I'll speak to you soon :) Take Care of yourselves :)
As the title suggests, unrequited kindness is something that's been playing on my mind of late.
There are many times and many people to whom we don't give what they deserve, whether that be members of our family, typically our parents, or whether that be our close friends and even more so the kind stranger who you may never ever speak to again.
It can sometimes be a case of karma and therefore, by showing love and kindness to other people without the promise of them doing something in return, perhaps we can get some more goodness circulating around society :) Sometimes it does feel like there is an awful lot of hate in the world that can sometimes drown out the small kindnesses that people to do to us on a daily basis and I personally feel uncomfortable with that fact.
One person who clearly demonstrated to me something that you can do to someone kindly, was Carrie Hope Fletcher who makes YouTube videos, for all of those of you who aren't familiar with Carrie. That isn't her primary profession as she's also a Broadway singer and is currently playing Eponine in Les Mis which is absolutely phenomenal and a dream come true for her. Little biography over, she suggested to her viewers a wonderful idea called the Hopeful Notes. These would involve writing a kind word on a piece of paper, a post-it note if you liked, and just leaving it in a public place for someone to find. It was wonderful because it was a simple idea and yet you could completely change someone's outlook on the day by doing so.
Despite the fact the idea may not be for many of us, it just goes to show that though there is a lot of bad in the world, good still has it's rightful place and small kindnesses can still go a long way, even if it feels insignificant at the time.
For those of you who'd like to find out more about Carrie, her blog is here (x) and her YouTube channel is here (x) :)
Thank you ever so much for reading and I hope that you have a wonderful day! :)
