So last week, I began the next phase of my education - Sixth Form. This is where I'll spend the next two years of my life and where I'll complete my A Levels.
The main problem I feel like I'm facing in this new phase of my life is keeping new friends. I've met some new people but what I feel like is my main problem is that I feel like I have no more to say, I feel like I'm inadequate and that there's no way for me to hold onto new friends because sometimes I don't have the right interests to be able to discuss anything further with them.
For me, this can be for a couple of reasons.
- As part of my religion, I don't listen to music and this means that a subject that lots of people can slip into quite easy is blocked off for me which means that I can't really use that as a way to get to know a person.
- I hate gossiping and over the past few years I've come to realise how easy it can be to say something small against someone, especially if they're a teacher because it feels like a role of being a secondary school kid is to always bitch about your least favourite teacher. Though it's definitely a normal thing in student culture, I now feel a lot more hesitant to say much against teachers unless it's something about their teaching style that's going to directly affect the grade that I'm going to get at the end of the year. This means that I don't tend to go down the route of saying something against someone else route to start a new conversation.
- I don't really watch many TV shows either. That's simply because I know that I'll end up getting sucked in and I'll lose a heap load of time I could've been using else where. It also begs the question that how much can you talk about one program? The only thing I can use to justify this question is if new episodes have been airing and I think that's one great thing about YouTube because there's always new videos going up and there are always new successes and comedies to be enjoyed and celebrated.
- I'm a hermit and don't really go out much. This means that I can't really have many new experiences with new friends to become better friends over and can be quite detrimental to me making new friends which is rather sad.
As a conclusion, I feel like whenever there are people who are funnier than me and know of more bands and more TV shows, they're never bound to stay with me because I'm nowhere near the kinds of people that they could be becoming friends with.
I have no idea what you guys will think of this post but please feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments below and I hope to speak to you soon!
p.s. If you'd like to me to do a post on my thoughts on Sixth Form so far or any other requests. please do feel free to leave a comment and I'll be happy to look into it :)
Hi,
ReplyDeleteI read this post by chance and it made me quite sad.
Gossiping is definitely unkind and unnecessary, but some types of people feel good having a common enemy, especially if they don't enjoy/absolutely loathe the way a class is held.
You may be ahead of of the curve about TV, it definitely sucks up time, in ways videos on the net do not.
Going out to places to spend time with friends is possibly the only way to make connections with your peers. So maybe that's worth looking in to?
The thing that struck me the hardest was this: How is it possible that avoiding listening to all music is part of your religion?
First of all, thank you for reading, it means a lot.
DeleteSecondly, I can understand where people come from doing what they do but I feel like it hurts me more when they use the teacher as a scape goat for inappropriate jokes. I can completely understand if the teacher doesn't teach well and you want to vent your frustrations about that but when it goes beyond what's in their control or what's even true, I personally prefer not to get involved.
I would agree, I do want to find more ways of spending time with friends because as much as internet friends are amazing, irl friendship can never be replaced. Thank you for reminding me of that!
I was talking to a good friend of mine about it and he put it like this: it's more about giving yourself head space in comparison to a form of escape. Most people I've come across use music as a way of escaping, a way of relaxing and a way of feeling better and that's great for them but in my religion, it's more about giving yourself more headspace where you're not distracted by random lyrics that have got into your head. Doe that make sense?
I just wanted to finish by assuring you that I'm an immensely happy person and I do accept that my life isn't perfect but that I'm always in search of ways in which I can make my life better.
Thank you for your comment!
That's more than OK. I can agree about the level of venting, if it's a personal attack then, sure, don't get involved. In fact remaining impassive works best.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure how much I can agree on the headspace point, sometimes musical escapism (even instrumental/non-lyricised) can be engaging, thought-provoking, and change the scenery in your mind and provide one with headspace as much as having a head clear of music does.
I have read neuroscientific literature that states music is a dual-hemispheric skill. For example, Mozart, composer (right brain-dominant) both achieved great things (writing minuets, sonatas, and symphonies by age of 8) but he also was able to speak four languages fluently, including his native, indicating his left hemisphere was as active as his right. The same has been said of Einstein, scientist, who developed most famously, the theory of relativity. However, despite having failed Maths in school, he enjoyed such things as violin-playing. This suggests that the greatest human potential, can only be realised by interaction of these two hemispheres i.e. use of both sides of the brain.
It was interesting and informative to read your responses. I wish you luck on your ongoing journey.