Dear golly it has been over a year since I posted here!
What I have for you today felt as though it couldn't really go much elsewhere and I do apologise for the fact I do not have the patience to describe the whole story of Parade's End.
I in the past couple of days have gone through the BBC miniseries that came out in 2012 with the wonderful Benedict Cumberbatch. I have to say to my sister and I's standards that man certainly has the hair gift to pull off all sorts of natural tones and blonde and his character of Christopher Tietjens was one of my favourites.
What I love about Christopher Tietjens is that he wasn't afraid to be proper when it could have otherwise have been easy to say, to hell with it. He sees what he sees and he feels what he feels but he accepts that sometimes being proper doesn't work anymore. When being proper doesn't hold value anymore. Even though propriety can lead to unhappiness. What I admire about Tietjens is that he has such an immense amount of knowledge and enviable foresight with the knowledge that he has. It takes one to be able to put information into places where they have meaning and can be applied.
What I admire about his wife, cruel as she is and as much as she wants all that she wants for herself, is that she sees what kind of a man her husband is. How straight and proper and kind he is to not disgrace her. And how that frustrates her that he uses what he knows for right.
Lady Macmaster makes me laugh as a character too and makes me quite sad, in a sense but I'm glad that Valentine holds onto her own beliefs and values no matter what happens. I love her valiant fight for happiness and for girls to understand and not be kept in the dark. For education and equal rights. Lady Macmaster I think was overshadowed by her wild pastor of a husband who was utterly mad. She was scared for what would happen and it made her quite the lady who valued survival. But of course once he had died and was out of the way her true self came out and deary me.
Overall I have to say I detest how rumours can spread and how easy it is to misjudge the values of others in comparison to what we hold dear in ourselves. How unhappy propriety in the face of impropriety can make us. And how you cannot not love the traditions we hold amongst friends and frenemies alike.
Thursday 30 March 2017
Tuesday 5 January 2016
My Mind Movie and Videogames
Hello all! Happy New Year :D
It's been a while but today I'd like to share with you a double response to Matt's blog, in particular his two most recent posts (here and here) which I have really enjoyed mulling over and thinking about. Definitely check it out for daily awesomeness!
So the first blog post I'd like to respond to today talks about the Mind Movie that we all have going on in our minds. It's the childish mind which is separate from ourselves that likes to take us away from where we'd like to go with its wants and needs and complaints. So today, I'd like to give you guys an insight into my mind movie, what it tells me and how I counteract it because more often than not, it is wrong.
My mind movie often has me believing that staying up late is a very good idea and that isn't necessarily good because it means I can't always work at full potential the next day because my mind clouds. I feel like my expectations tend to become harder to tackle because it becomes much more clouded by my need to sleep and feel more well rested. It makes me believe that I don't have the energy or the mindset to do what I'd like to do and this frustrates me immensely because although I do feel better after having slept, I lose time and then it just becomes a vicious circle.
The main thing I'm struggling with is priorities. I have so many things I want to do, especially keeping good relations with friends and doing well in school. It makes it hard to make sure that I realise what I need to do to get where I get to now and not just what feels right in this moment. Because as I've said before, all we have is the present moment and if I can't do the right thing now for the future, what on earth will happen to me? How do I prioritise? Grrrr........
I also then struggle with is keeping my mind out of the movie when in routine and when doing things that I can do as if it's the first time but other times I just lose where I am and get lost in the depths of my imagination.
It loves to tell me that I'm doing enough but also that friends don't believe I matter. That I don't really matter in the peripheral but I know how to combat that thought, remembering that I'm always a contribution and seeing the good that I do and why I do it. Mattering is hard sometimes though because once I realise that I'm a good person, it's sometimes hard to believe why I should matter and why I should expect to matter. I think this comes from the investment of time but expecting something in return is where the problem then lies.
I think another of the things that I face is making sure I don't expect anything from strangers too. Just because you give kindness to the world, doesn't mean it doesn't have to give it to you back with that same person. It comes around for sure but it's so important to remember that you are not yourself to everyone. You are who they perceive you as through their world view and through what they value. You cannot control that. I think it's also important to not expect that from friends but how much of what you see of a person is who they are? Sure, their lack of presence could tell you something about them but does that tell you anything about who they are and who they want to be? Not necessarily.
That isn't to say that not looking deeply into the present can't be joyful but I would have to say your imagination can't provide you the joy that you can get in the reality of the moment. If you're truly present, you can't doubt what you experience because it's full of purpose. That's what matters.
Going onto the second blog post, seeing life as a video game and seeing that there are things you can control and cannot control is such an interesting analogy! Constantly not only accepting reality but seeing it as something that you can affect and not just as something that flies by. But that's only if you ground yourself in reality and you see the story as it happens. TOO COOL!
I think that's probably enough rambling for today ahaha, just making up for lost time, I hope you all have a wonderful time doing what you're doing and who knows, perhaps you'll see me around sometime soon!
Oooooh btw guys, I started youtubing. You might have missed that ahah, here's the channel :)
It's been a while but today I'd like to share with you a double response to Matt's blog, in particular his two most recent posts (here and here) which I have really enjoyed mulling over and thinking about. Definitely check it out for daily awesomeness!
So the first blog post I'd like to respond to today talks about the Mind Movie that we all have going on in our minds. It's the childish mind which is separate from ourselves that likes to take us away from where we'd like to go with its wants and needs and complaints. So today, I'd like to give you guys an insight into my mind movie, what it tells me and how I counteract it because more often than not, it is wrong.
My mind movie often has me believing that staying up late is a very good idea and that isn't necessarily good because it means I can't always work at full potential the next day because my mind clouds. I feel like my expectations tend to become harder to tackle because it becomes much more clouded by my need to sleep and feel more well rested. It makes me believe that I don't have the energy or the mindset to do what I'd like to do and this frustrates me immensely because although I do feel better after having slept, I lose time and then it just becomes a vicious circle.
The main thing I'm struggling with is priorities. I have so many things I want to do, especially keeping good relations with friends and doing well in school. It makes it hard to make sure that I realise what I need to do to get where I get to now and not just what feels right in this moment. Because as I've said before, all we have is the present moment and if I can't do the right thing now for the future, what on earth will happen to me? How do I prioritise? Grrrr........
I also then struggle with is keeping my mind out of the movie when in routine and when doing things that I can do as if it's the first time but other times I just lose where I am and get lost in the depths of my imagination.
It loves to tell me that I'm doing enough but also that friends don't believe I matter. That I don't really matter in the peripheral but I know how to combat that thought, remembering that I'm always a contribution and seeing the good that I do and why I do it. Mattering is hard sometimes though because once I realise that I'm a good person, it's sometimes hard to believe why I should matter and why I should expect to matter. I think this comes from the investment of time but expecting something in return is where the problem then lies.
I think another of the things that I face is making sure I don't expect anything from strangers too. Just because you give kindness to the world, doesn't mean it doesn't have to give it to you back with that same person. It comes around for sure but it's so important to remember that you are not yourself to everyone. You are who they perceive you as through their world view and through what they value. You cannot control that. I think it's also important to not expect that from friends but how much of what you see of a person is who they are? Sure, their lack of presence could tell you something about them but does that tell you anything about who they are and who they want to be? Not necessarily.
That isn't to say that not looking deeply into the present can't be joyful but I would have to say your imagination can't provide you the joy that you can get in the reality of the moment. If you're truly present, you can't doubt what you experience because it's full of purpose. That's what matters.
Going onto the second blog post, seeing life as a video game and seeing that there are things you can control and cannot control is such an interesting analogy! Constantly not only accepting reality but seeing it as something that you can affect and not just as something that flies by. But that's only if you ground yourself in reality and you see the story as it happens. TOO COOL!
I think that's probably enough rambling for today ahaha, just making up for lost time, I hope you all have a wonderful time doing what you're doing and who knows, perhaps you'll see me around sometime soon!
Oooooh btw guys, I started youtubing. You might have missed that ahah, here's the channel :)
Tuesday 8 September 2015
University - What it means to be 'Clever'
Hey guys! Long time no see!
I hope that those of you who are in the northern hemisphere like me have had a wonderful summer and break!
Today, a thought occurred to me, well a string of thoughts to be precise.
When you want to apply to university for courses that typically have higher grade requirements, it often feels like more and more and more is expected of you, as if talent in many areas and being a gifted individual is something that you can always choose.
That you have to be part of a sports club, that you've done well in your student council at school and actively take part. Perhaps you're even Head Boy or Head Girl!
I feel like I'm growing more and more towards disliking this image a lot because it shows blatant disregard for those who are more talented in those areas and work hard to get to where they are. I feel like it disregards those who aren't gifted as well as talented and makes them look more inferior in comparison and that is never the case! Never!
I just wish that more people would be given the opportunity to study at amazing institutions without having to be book smart because there are so many different ways of being smart and it feels like society is still stuck in tradition, where book smartness is almost always a ticket to get to places you want to go.
And where does it leave you when you've been told and have been book smart your entire life but you're not this perfect individual who's done everything under the face of the sun and done well in it? How is society supposed to make you feel, like you've somehow failed just by being yourself and doing what you can and what you're comfortable with?
Though I guess it can depend on where you set your eyes. There will always be a place for book smartness and all rounders in the most prized institutions but what I've grown to love in my search for my ideal university is that generally, you can find a place where you are the best candidate and where you're the one they want to pick for all of your flaws.
To end, if you're like me and you're trying to find a place for you, remember that you are invaluable being yourself and comparing yourself to other people or to a set of expectations that an institution sets doesn't determine your value as a person.
Cherish yourself. You're amazing, I don't know you and I know it.
I hope I can speak to you guys soon! Onwards and upwards!
Have a wonderful time, doing what you're doing and if you'd like to find out what I've been up to, I daily blogged the entirety of my summer on my side Tumblr blog!
<2
I hope that those of you who are in the northern hemisphere like me have had a wonderful summer and break!
Today, a thought occurred to me, well a string of thoughts to be precise.
When you want to apply to university for courses that typically have higher grade requirements, it often feels like more and more and more is expected of you, as if talent in many areas and being a gifted individual is something that you can always choose.
That you have to be part of a sports club, that you've done well in your student council at school and actively take part. Perhaps you're even Head Boy or Head Girl!I feel like I'm growing more and more towards disliking this image a lot because it shows blatant disregard for those who are more talented in those areas and work hard to get to where they are. I feel like it disregards those who aren't gifted as well as talented and makes them look more inferior in comparison and that is never the case! Never!
I just wish that more people would be given the opportunity to study at amazing institutions without having to be book smart because there are so many different ways of being smart and it feels like society is still stuck in tradition, where book smartness is almost always a ticket to get to places you want to go.
And where does it leave you when you've been told and have been book smart your entire life but you're not this perfect individual who's done everything under the face of the sun and done well in it? How is society supposed to make you feel, like you've somehow failed just by being yourself and doing what you can and what you're comfortable with?
Though I guess it can depend on where you set your eyes. There will always be a place for book smartness and all rounders in the most prized institutions but what I've grown to love in my search for my ideal university is that generally, you can find a place where you are the best candidate and where you're the one they want to pick for all of your flaws.
To end, if you're like me and you're trying to find a place for you, remember that you are invaluable being yourself and comparing yourself to other people or to a set of expectations that an institution sets doesn't determine your value as a person.
Cherish yourself. You're amazing, I don't know you and I know it.
I hope I can speak to you guys soon! Onwards and upwards!
Have a wonderful time, doing what you're doing and if you'd like to find out what I've been up to, I daily blogged the entirety of my summer on my side Tumblr blog!
<2
Wednesday 12 August 2015
A First World Realisation
Hey guys! I hope that you're all well!
So today, I think I realised a truth that I hadn't actually quite faced up to before, that my relationship to Twitter really isn't all too healthy for me. It's quite similar to many addictions that you can get in modern day times where notifications become things you can't ignore and I've realised that I hate it. A lot.
It stops me from being present with my family and in many ways it's very inorganic. I've recently started talking to an internet friend of mine who I've known for about two years now and talking to her irl was much different to talking to her online. The challenges are different but I must say I think I much rather prefer spending time with people face to face than I do with my phone.
I absolutely love my internet friends and the support that they give me but the nature of our friendships is so completely different to irl. It's no wonder that people tend to freak out a bit when they meet their internet friends irl because they're so afraid about the difference in the experience they're going to have.
Internet friendships are awesome, don't get me wrong and they certainly function well in their own capacity but I think I've definitely become overwhelmed with the amount of time I spend trying to be in more than one place at one time. I know and now acknowledge more that when I'm talking to friends, perhaps they should be the only people I'm talking to.
The internet is so bad for being in the present moment and I've got to say I don't blame my friends who take ages to reply because who wants to be sucked away from the present? Organise a time and spend that quality time with them. Don't spread yourself thinly everywhere and expect it to work well because it's simply not the way we're supposed to function.
So that's all. I hope that you guys have a wonderful day and I hope to speak to you very soon indeed!
So today, I think I realised a truth that I hadn't actually quite faced up to before, that my relationship to Twitter really isn't all too healthy for me. It's quite similar to many addictions that you can get in modern day times where notifications become things you can't ignore and I've realised that I hate it. A lot.
It stops me from being present with my family and in many ways it's very inorganic. I've recently started talking to an internet friend of mine who I've known for about two years now and talking to her irl was much different to talking to her online. The challenges are different but I must say I think I much rather prefer spending time with people face to face than I do with my phone.
I absolutely love my internet friends and the support that they give me but the nature of our friendships is so completely different to irl. It's no wonder that people tend to freak out a bit when they meet their internet friends irl because they're so afraid about the difference in the experience they're going to have.
Internet friendships are awesome, don't get me wrong and they certainly function well in their own capacity but I think I've definitely become overwhelmed with the amount of time I spend trying to be in more than one place at one time. I know and now acknowledge more that when I'm talking to friends, perhaps they should be the only people I'm talking to.
The internet is so bad for being in the present moment and I've got to say I don't blame my friends who take ages to reply because who wants to be sucked away from the present? Organise a time and spend that quality time with them. Don't spread yourself thinly everywhere and expect it to work well because it's simply not the way we're supposed to function.
So that's all. I hope that you guys have a wonderful day and I hope to speak to you very soon indeed!
Sunday 9 August 2015
'Tolerating People' - NOPE
Hey guys! I hope that you're all well!
Last weekend, I went to a wedding. As is customary in my faith, there was a lecture and it was probably one of my favourites of all those I've heard over the years because it was so mindful. I loved it!
One part that really stuck out for me and that struck a cord was the phrase that we often use in 'tolerating' other people which, if you think about it, isn't really ever the way to go. If you ever want to improve yourself, the thing that you should strive towards is realising that other people are much like yourself and are therefore different and diverse and a whole universe of variables within themselves.
They have as much right to do what they'd like to do as you do and therefore you should strive towards accepting and celebrating everyone to some extent at the very least because you can get so much joy from that of others. You don't have to perceive loud people as annoyances, you can join in on their joy from afar and benefit. You can take so much goodness from other people, if only you try.
This concept of tolerating other people is also not something you'd really want in a relationship, especially one which is with someone who you may see as a life partner. In those sorts of relationships, it's always about patience and compromise and seeing that diversity and the differences between yourself and accepting them. With the length of these relationships, it can be hard because the person you knew from years ago isn't the person you connect with today but that's just the nature of the beast and being able to be thankful for them is so important.
This also reminds me of this video from Hank Green a few months ago. What it taught me is that
diversity is really something we should celebrate and the place where two different areas cross together and meet can make an area of astounding beauty and excitement. Use places where you differ from other people as a way of forging even more lasting connections through empathising and growing beyond yourself and your bubble. It's so possible and it's incredible what you can get!
I hope that you guys enjoyed this post, thank you so much for listening! I hope that you have a wonderful time doing what you're doing and I'll speak to you very soon indeed!
Last weekend, I went to a wedding. As is customary in my faith, there was a lecture and it was probably one of my favourites of all those I've heard over the years because it was so mindful. I loved it!
One part that really stuck out for me and that struck a cord was the phrase that we often use in 'tolerating' other people which, if you think about it, isn't really ever the way to go. If you ever want to improve yourself, the thing that you should strive towards is realising that other people are much like yourself and are therefore different and diverse and a whole universe of variables within themselves.
They have as much right to do what they'd like to do as you do and therefore you should strive towards accepting and celebrating everyone to some extent at the very least because you can get so much joy from that of others. You don't have to perceive loud people as annoyances, you can join in on their joy from afar and benefit. You can take so much goodness from other people, if only you try.
This concept of tolerating other people is also not something you'd really want in a relationship, especially one which is with someone who you may see as a life partner. In those sorts of relationships, it's always about patience and compromise and seeing that diversity and the differences between yourself and accepting them. With the length of these relationships, it can be hard because the person you knew from years ago isn't the person you connect with today but that's just the nature of the beast and being able to be thankful for them is so important.
 |
| Hank uses nature to describe what happens when two different environments collide |
diversity is really something we should celebrate and the place where two different areas cross together and meet can make an area of astounding beauty and excitement. Use places where you differ from other people as a way of forging even more lasting connections through empathising and growing beyond yourself and your bubble. It's so possible and it's incredible what you can get!
I hope that you guys enjoyed this post, thank you so much for listening! I hope that you have a wonderful time doing what you're doing and I'll speak to you very soon indeed!
Thursday 6 August 2015
Impressions of one another
Hey guys! I hope that you're all doing very well indeed!
Very recently, I had a discussion with a friend of mine about one of the cons of knowing someone for
a long time and that's that sometimes if you change, that isn't really taken into account or fully accepted by someone who's known you for a long time. This isn't always consciously done at all but when you're stuck in a way of doing something for a long time, it can easily become the image that is associated with you and that's hard to shake off.
It can sometimes be that you're childhood friends and that when you mature it can be kind of odd to realise as someone looking in from the outside as someone's who's been there but who hasn't undergone the changes. It can feel like people are always going to stay the way that they are but it's always important to be present and to treat people with respect and dignity, especially if they're trying to break a habit that's been with them for years and become a different person to the one everyone knows.
Sometimes it's not always even necessarily that you're unhappy with the way that people know you, you've just made even more improvements to make yourself an even better person and you want other people to know that.
In this way, it's always important to be present and to be aware of the person that you're connecting with today because we're all ongoing projects and we're all changing, for better or for worse. We should always treat the person that we meet and treat them with respect.
It is important to be wary, having said that, that we always do so because not everyone in the world is open minded and therefore to make sure we don't hurt other people we treat everyone in the best way possible.
Thank you so much for listening guys! I hope you have a wonderful time doing what you're doing what you're doing and I'll speak to you very soon indeed!
Very recently, I had a discussion with a friend of mine about one of the cons of knowing someone fora long time and that's that sometimes if you change, that isn't really taken into account or fully accepted by someone who's known you for a long time. This isn't always consciously done at all but when you're stuck in a way of doing something for a long time, it can easily become the image that is associated with you and that's hard to shake off.
It can sometimes be that you're childhood friends and that when you mature it can be kind of odd to realise as someone looking in from the outside as someone's who's been there but who hasn't undergone the changes. It can feel like people are always going to stay the way that they are but it's always important to be present and to treat people with respect and dignity, especially if they're trying to break a habit that's been with them for years and become a different person to the one everyone knows.
Sometimes it's not always even necessarily that you're unhappy with the way that people know you, you've just made even more improvements to make yourself an even better person and you want other people to know that.
In this way, it's always important to be present and to be aware of the person that you're connecting with today because we're all ongoing projects and we're all changing, for better or for worse. We should always treat the person that we meet and treat them with respect.
It is important to be wary, having said that, that we always do so because not everyone in the world is open minded and therefore to make sure we don't hurt other people we treat everyone in the best way possible.
Thank you so much for listening guys! I hope you have a wonderful time doing what you're doing what you're doing and I'll speak to you very soon indeed!
Monday 3 August 2015
Gratitude and Happiness
Hey guys!
I hope that you've all been well, it's been a while!
Today, I read this blog post from Marc and Angel who I love to read because their posts are always about life truths that can really change your life. They're simply and utterly amazing.
What it reminded me about was the fact that being thankful for everything that you have can make you such a happy person. This is often because you can find ways of taking the goods from what could be on the surface a bad situation and it can leave you feeling so much more fulfilled because you've taken from it rather than let it take from you. It's wonderful!
Being thankful also makes you happy because it makes you realise that you have so much right in this moment. For many of us, we take a lot of things for granted and only stop to be thankful when those things are taken away from us. This can include our health as well as our wealth but also the people that we have around us.
It's become so important to me to try and be thankful today, in the now, because quite often things we have today can become things we had, like friendships or any close friends. People can slip through our fingers because we're too busy looking the other way or worrying when there's so much now to see and be thankful for. Here and now. Not yesterday, not a week ago, not tomorrow either. Now.
So, I challenge you, stop for five minutes everyday and just be thankful for what you have and what's happened to you today. You wouldn't believe how much a bit of reflection can add to your joy and leave you feeling so much more content than you could've believed to be possible. I've tried to do this by both daily journaling as well as daily blogging on my side Tumblr blog everyday through summer. If that's something you'd be interested in reading, please do go and check it out! I would encourage you to do the same, even if it's an appreciation tweet or just a moment out of your day when you become truly present.
It makes all the difference.
I hope that you all have a wonderful time doing what you're doing and I hope to speak to you very soon indeed!
I hope that you've all been well, it's been a while!
Today, I read this blog post from Marc and Angel who I love to read because their posts are always about life truths that can really change your life. They're simply and utterly amazing.
What it reminded me about was the fact that being thankful for everything that you have can make you such a happy person. This is often because you can find ways of taking the goods from what could be on the surface a bad situation and it can leave you feeling so much more fulfilled because you've taken from it rather than let it take from you. It's wonderful!
Being thankful also makes you happy because it makes you realise that you have so much right in this moment. For many of us, we take a lot of things for granted and only stop to be thankful when those things are taken away from us. This can include our health as well as our wealth but also the people that we have around us.
It's become so important to me to try and be thankful today, in the now, because quite often things we have today can become things we had, like friendships or any close friends. People can slip through our fingers because we're too busy looking the other way or worrying when there's so much now to see and be thankful for. Here and now. Not yesterday, not a week ago, not tomorrow either. Now.
So, I challenge you, stop for five minutes everyday and just be thankful for what you have and what's happened to you today. You wouldn't believe how much a bit of reflection can add to your joy and leave you feeling so much more content than you could've believed to be possible. I've tried to do this by both daily journaling as well as daily blogging on my side Tumblr blog everyday through summer. If that's something you'd be interested in reading, please do go and check it out! I would encourage you to do the same, even if it's an appreciation tweet or just a moment out of your day when you become truly present.
It makes all the difference.
I hope that you all have a wonderful time doing what you're doing and I hope to speak to you very soon indeed!
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