Judgements: Reliable or Nah?

This has been something that's swum through my mind over the past few years: when someone tells you something is 'wrong' with you in the way you are, or the way you do things, how much should you have to feel obliged to change because of what they've said.

I guess it can all come back down to what they've said I guess, whether it be something you've done as a one-off that was an accident perhaps because you were having an off day. Or is it something that goes that little bit deeper like 'you talk too much', or 'you always talk about yourself' and that sort of thing. I've picked these because I've experienced them before but there are countless othet things that can be said that can get under your skin.

I think we should always be wary but here are a few things to take into consideration:

1) Why have they said what they've said? Would they have good intentions for having said what they've said? Can you trust their word?

2) Ask someone close to you if they agree with what the person has said. If you're not sure whether to believe the person or not, feel free to ask someone who knows you well and ask for their opinion - if there's any truth to it, maybe they can shed some light on it.

3) Watch out for yourself: do you see any truth in what they've said? This is really important - if you're honest with yourself and you detect a problem within the way you act then you can feel more self-aware and make steps towards changing yourself.

However, what I do want to make clear here is the fact it is entirely up to you what you consider to be something worth changing.

As a personal example, I was told by a person who I used to be close to that I talked too much about myself. After much deliberation I realised that wasn't the actual problem - it was the fact I interrupted too much and didn't allow other people to talk and let out their problems before sharing my own. In this way you can see that I wanted to solve this problem because it was a matter of manners, not necessarily something that was personal but a characteristic that would be considered rude no matter who I was talking to.

In my opinion, if you're polite and considerate, who should dictate what kind of person you are from there onwards but yourself? Don't change yourself to please others because you'll never be good enough. Be happy with yourself and no-one can take that away from you.

I hope that you guys enjoyed this blog post! Please do feel free to tell me what you think in the comments and please do feel free to suggest topics for future blog posts!

Thank you ever so much for reading and I'll speak to you soon :)