A First World Realisation

Hey guys! I hope that you're all well!

So today, I think I realised a truth that I hadn't actually quite faced up to before, that my relationship to Twitter really isn't all too healthy for me. It's quite similar to many addictions that you can get in modern day times where notifications become things you can't ignore and I've realised that I hate it. A lot.

It stops me from being present with my family and in many ways it's very inorganic. I've recently started talking to an internet friend of mine who I've known for about two years now and talking to her irl was much different to talking to her online. The challenges are different but I must say I think I much rather prefer spending time with people face to face than I do with my phone.

I absolutely love my internet friends and the support that they give me but the nature of our friendships is so completely different to irl. It's no wonder that people tend to freak out a bit when they meet their internet friends irl because they're so afraid about the difference in the experience they're going to have.

Internet friendships are awesome, don't get me wrong and they certainly function well in their own capacity but I think I've definitely become overwhelmed with the amount of time I spend trying to be in more than one place at one time. I know and now acknowledge more that when I'm talking to friends, perhaps they should be the only people I'm talking to.

The internet is so bad for being in the present moment and I've got to say I don't blame my friends who take ages to reply because who wants to be sucked away from the present? Organise a time and spend that quality time with them. Don't spread yourself thinly everywhere and expect it to work well because it's simply not the way we're supposed to function.

So that's all. I hope that you guys have a wonderful day and I hope to speak to you very soon indeed!

'Tolerating People' - NOPE

Hey guys! I hope that you're all well!

Last weekend, I went to a wedding. As is customary in my faith, there was a lecture and it was probably one of my favourites of all those I've heard over the years because it was so mindful. I loved it!

One part that really stuck out for me and that struck a cord was the phrase that we often use in 'tolerating' other people which, if you think about it, isn't really ever the way to go. If you ever want to improve yourself, the thing that you should strive towards is realising that other people are much like yourself and are therefore different and diverse and a whole universe of variables within themselves.

They have as much right to do what they'd like to do as you do and therefore you should strive towards accepting and celebrating everyone to some extent at the very least because you can get so much joy from that of others. You don't have to perceive loud people as annoyances, you can join in on their joy from afar and benefit. You can take so much goodness from other people, if only you try.

This concept of tolerating other people is also not something you'd really want in a relationship, especially one which is with someone who you may see as a life partner. In those sorts of relationships, it's always about patience and compromise and seeing that diversity and the differences between yourself and accepting them. With the length of these relationships, it can be hard because the person you knew from years ago isn't the person you connect with today but that's just the nature of the beast and being able to be thankful for them is so important.

Hank uses nature to describe what happens
when two different environments collide

This also reminds me of this video from Hank Green a few months ago. What it taught me is that
diversity is really something we should celebrate and the place where two different areas cross together and meet can make an area of astounding beauty and excitement. Use places where you differ from other people as a way of forging even more lasting connections through empathising and growing beyond yourself and your bubble. It's so possible and it's incredible what you can get!

I hope that you guys enjoyed this post, thank you so much for listening! I hope that you have a wonderful time doing what you're doing and I'll speak to you very soon indeed!

Impressions of one another

Hey guys! I hope that you're all doing very well indeed!

Very recently, I had a discussion with a friend of mine about one of the cons of knowing someone for
a long time and that's that sometimes if you change, that isn't really taken into account or fully accepted by someone who's known you for a long time. This isn't always consciously done at all but when you're stuck in a way of doing something for a long time, it can easily become the image that is associated with you and that's hard to shake off.

It can sometimes be that you're childhood friends and that when you mature it can be kind of odd to realise as someone looking in from the outside as someone's who's been there but who hasn't undergone the changes. It can feel like people are always going to stay the way that they are but it's always important to be present and to treat people with respect and dignity, especially if they're trying to break a habit that's been with them for years and become a different person to the one everyone knows.

Sometimes it's not always even necessarily that you're unhappy with the way that people know you, you've just made even more improvements to make yourself an even better person and you want other people to know that.

In this way, it's always important to be present and to be aware of the person that you're connecting with today because we're all ongoing projects and we're all changing, for better or for worse. We should always treat the person that we meet and treat them with respect.

It is important to be wary, having said that, that we always do so because not everyone in the world is open minded and therefore to make sure we don't hurt other people we treat everyone in the best way possible.

Thank you so much for listening guys! I hope you have a wonderful time doing what you're doing what you're doing and I'll speak to you very soon indeed!

Gratitude and Happiness

Hey guys!

I hope that you've all been well, it's been a while!

Today, I read this blog post from Marc and Angel who I love to read because their posts are always about life truths that can really change your life. They're simply and utterly amazing.

What it reminded me about was the fact that being thankful for everything that you have can make you such a happy person. This is often because you can find ways of taking the goods from what could be on the surface a bad situation and it can leave you feeling so much more fulfilled because you've taken from it rather than let it take from you. It's wonderful!

Being thankful also makes you happy because it makes you realise that you have so much right in this moment. For many of us, we take a lot of things for granted and only stop to be thankful when those things are taken away from us. This can include our health as well as our wealth but also the people that we have around us.

It's become so important to me to try and be thankful today, in the now, because quite often things we have today can become things we had, like friendships or any close friends. People can slip through our fingers because we're too busy looking the other way or worrying when there's so much now to see and be thankful for. Here and now. Not yesterday, not a week ago, not tomorrow either. Now.

So, I challenge you, stop for five minutes everyday and just be thankful for what you have and what's happened to you today. You wouldn't believe how much a bit of reflection can add to your joy and leave you feeling so much more content than you could've believed to be possible. I've tried to do this by both daily journaling as well as daily blogging on my side Tumblr blog everyday through summer. If that's something you'd be interested in reading, please do go and check it out! I would encourage you to do the same, even if it's an appreciation tweet or just a moment out of your day when you become truly present.

It makes all the difference.

I hope that you all have a wonderful time doing what you're doing and I hope to speak to you very soon indeed!

What is Love?

Hey guys! I hope that you're very well indeed!

So today, I got drawn into watching even more Soul Pancake videos, particularly this one entitled 'What is Love?' which I absolutely loved. What I love about this kind of video by Soul Pancake is that they don't ever script their videos, or that's the impression you get, but they ask people of many races and cultures and ages and genders and it makes all the difference. It makes it feel so authentic and if you get the time, I would highly recommend you watch the video!
What is Love?

For today though, I'd like to explore some of the answers that the people gave in the video when asked the question 'What is Love?'

When watching the video, the one that stood out for me as the one I resonated the most with was

'I've been married 55 years and our main job is to look after each other and see to it that we are our best selves, so to speak.... To me, that's love!'

This really spoke to me and what I believe in because like what some of the other people said, love is also about accepting the other person for who they are, it's a two way street, it's about doing things that you wouldn't normally do because you want the other person to be happy. But it's not just about accepting another person, for me it's what the man said, it's all about helping each other up and being a mirror for the other person to show them their beauty and their flaws but to help them improve and become even better.

A man even gave a definition where he said; 'The condition or the state where the happiness of another is essential to one's own'  and that too spoke to me.

Quite often, we, like the people in the video talk about love and loving other people but we don't always explore what that means for us. We don't talk about what it means if we truly love someone and how that affects how we act and how we feel. We don't always realise the meaning behind our words and the weight of the concepts of which we speak. It's not something easy to do but with reflection, we can achieve so much more.

On a final note, another idea I loved from this video was, if you consider anyone like you're family, like your own flesh and blood and as close to you as that, that's love. In many ways I love this because it means accepting someone as like you and as part of you and your story and your world. You can't choose your family but in this sense, you can. You can choose who makes up the fabric of your world and who you would stretch yourself for to make sure that they're happy. You have that choice.

I hope that you guys find this video as inspiring and thought provoking as I have! It's less than five minutes long, I'd definitely encourage you to watch it!

Have a wonderful time doing what you're doing and I'll speak to you very soon indeed!

The Book of Life - Loved it

Hey guys! I hope that you're all well!

So today, on a friend's recommendation, I watched The Book of Life and it was incredibly beautiful for a number of reasons. Before I begin, here's the synopsis of the film to give it some context :)

'Manolo, a young man who is torn between fulfilling the expectations of his family and following his heart, embarks on an adventure that spans three fantastic worlds where he must face his greatest fears.'

From here on, I'm going to tell you what I loved about this film and I will warn you from here that there are spoilers - I tried to signpost them all but it got a little ridiculous so I'll just warn you from now - SPOILERS AHEAD! :)

The first thing I loved was the fact that Manolo, the main character, follows what he wants to do fully. When it comes down to it, he follows what he believes to be right and doesn't use brute force and doesn't kill the bull though that's what his family has traditionally done for generations. He also finds out that no-one before him in his family has followed their passion for singing but went on to become bull fighters as all of their family were. The fact that he follows his passion and does the right thing ignites the spark in his own family and in his best friend, Joaquin to be selfless and honest is what I love. He uses his own strengths in both singing and in bullfighting to do what he feels he should do and to win because he is right and not because he's somehow cheating.

This theme is also explored because both Joaquin and Manolo are in love with Maria and the three of them make up what is very similar to the Three Musketeers. Both Joaquin and Manolo try and impress Maria but what I love about Manolo and why I think he does end up with Maria is because he takes her as she is and enhances her independence in comparison to Joaquin. She loves to fence, is also very good at kung fu and also spurs the town of San Angel where they all live, to stand up and defend the town they love so much. Manolo dances with her to defeat the evil pirate guy who wants to destroy their town and in doing so, they both fight him together. Joaquin when trying to impress Maria, accidentally falls into the trap of telling her that she should be someone who's the stereotypical housewife - evidently not a role that fits for her.

What I did love about how Joaquin grows as a character is the fact that at the end, Manolo goes into the town's largest ringing bell which had fallen from its place and which covers himself and the evil pirate as the evil pirate detonates many bombs all at once. Manolo in fact, survives because he was given a special green medal that the evil pirate wanted from Joaquin which grants the wearer the ability to not be hurt by anything and therefore everlasting life. This therefore means that in doing the selfless act, he survives but what we also find out is that Joaquin was going to go in too and that he was willing to sacrifice himself without the medal for the good of the town.

Manolo with his honesty and bravery was able to light the spark in Joaquin to encourage him to be brave ('never surrender!') and to do the right thing, even if meant danger for him. I think that's what I really loved about this film.

If you guys do get the time, I would highly recommend watching it! It's also immensely humourous and I'm sure that you'll enjoy it :D

I hope you all have a wonderful time doing what you're doing and I'll speak to you very soon indeed!

The Serenity Prayer

Hey guys! I hope that you're well!

This post was inspired by this lovely little youtuber here whose video about Giving Up Power has inspired this post, in part :)

In this video, Liz talks about what is known as The Serenity Prayer which at a glance, I thought I'd never heard of but I'm sure we all have at some point in our lives:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference.

What Liz talks about in her video is the fact that all of the things mentioned take courage.

You always need courage to be able to accept that some battles, no matter how fiercely you want to win them, that you have to back down and just them be the way they are. I think that this is immensely important because you can come to so much peace within your life when you stop trying to go against the current, which I believe is a topic I've discussed before. 

Sometimes it's hard to distinguish between battles worth fighting and battles that don't need to happen and where surrender is the best course of action but having the courage to look within yourself and without to search for the truth, no matter how hard it is to accept which in my current life situation, is definitely advice I need to take myself.

For me, distinguishing between circumstances around me that I believe are good for me and that don't need to change as well as recognising factors that are influencing my life more than I might expect is pretty hard. Life is never really black or white but what I'm learning in the most clumsy way possible, is that you've got to try and get the best that you can out of the life that you have and of the cards that you're dealt.

To everyone, you're a human being. That pretty much entails being flawed. 

Immensely so.

So don't be so hard on yourself, it's hard to know when to do things and when not to but just so long as you're ready to accept the consequences of your actions and you know that you've settled it within yourself, don't worry. 

And if you're not doing what you know to be right, maybe think again because you may not have the chance to put it right if you leave it much longer.

I hope that you guys enjoyed this post! Have a most wonderful time doing what you're doing and I hope to speak to you very soon indeed!

p.s. I'm sorry about the dodgy formatting, copying and pasting here doesn't work out too well :(